After 2004’s Anchorman, Step Brothers quotes have garnered the most quotes since their 2008 debut. The turbulent connection between Will Ferrell and John C. Reilly set against Adam Scott’s embodiment of clinginess, has since helped the movie attain cult status.
Step Brothers Quotes
Here are a bunch of Step Brothers quotes that will make you want to rewatch the movie.
1. “This cyclone in Vanuatu. Is it pan or pam?”
2. “Don’t lose your dinosaur.” — Robert Doback
3. “I’ve been called the songbird of my generation.”
4. “Gotta have my boats and hoes!” — Dale Doback
5. “ You’re just coming off stupid.”
6. “Last week I put liquid paper on a bee… And it died.”
7. “Don’t ever, ever touch my drum set. You understand?”
8. “Did we just become best friends? “Yep!”” —
9. “I’m Dale, but you have to call me Dragon.” — Dale Doback
10. “Dane Cook, pay–per–view, 20 minutes, let’s go!” — Derek
11. “I you wake me up… I will stab you, in the neck with a knife.”
12. “Dad, what are you doing? It’s ‘Shark Week’!” — Dale Doback
13. “I feel like a bolt hit the tip of my pe***!” — Brennan
14. “I traveled 500 miles to give you my seed!” — lumberjack Brennan
Funny Step Brothers Quotes
15. “Boats ‘n’ hoes, boats ‘n’ hoes / I gotta have my boats and hoes.”
16. “Robert better not get in my face, ’cause I’ll drop that mother f***er.”
17. “You know what makes my di** hard? — Derek
18. “I didn’t want Salmon! I said it four times! This wedding is horse sh**.”
19. “I wanna make a bank bro. I wanna drive a Range Rover. And I wanna get a**.”
20. “Your drumset is a wh***! I tea bagged your drum set!” — Brennan Huff
21. “Your singing is like a of Fergie and Jesus.” — Dale Doback
22. “I want to roll you into a little ball and shove you up my v***na.” — Alice. Step Brothers Quotes
23. “Get out of my face, or a**.” — Brennan Huff
24. “A dog is eating my mom and there’s nothing I can do!” — Brennan
25. “I got a belly full of white in me, and now you lay this sh** on me?!”
26. “You’re wearing tuxedos to a job interview that ”
27. “One time I wrestled a giraffe to the ground with my bare hands.” — Dale Doback
28. “I’m f***ing miserable. I had to get up at 10 o’clock this morning.” — Dale Doback
29. “Listen, gang, don’t be mad at Dale for ruining the story…and possibly the evening.”
30. “You and your mom are hillbillies. This is a house of learned doctors.” — Dale Doback
Astonishing Step Brother Quotes
31. “See that black smudge right there on the blade? Randy Jackson, from American Idol.”
32. “I’m Brennan.” “I’m Dale, but you have to call me Dragon.” “You have to call me .”
33. “The Nina, the Pinta, the Santa Marian I’ll do you in the bottom while you’re drinking Sangria.”
34. “This house is a f***ing prison!” “On Planet Bulls**t!” “In the galaxy of This S***s Camel D***s!”
35. “Oprah, , your wife.” You gotta f*** one, marry one, kill one. Go!” — Dale Doback
36. “Hey Derek, for shoulder pain? If you lick my butthole.” — Brennan
37. “You better not close your eyes, because as soon as you do, I’m gonna punch you square in the face!”
38. “Today I saw my own son use a bicycle as a weapon. You yelled ‘rape’ at the top of your lungs.” — Nancy
39. “You know what? I still hate you, but you’ve got a pretty ” — Brennan Huff
40. “They broke! The bunk beds were such a terrible idea, why did you make us do it? There;s blood everywhere!”
Crazy Step Brother Quotes
41. “Sticks and stones may break my bones, but I will kick you repeatedly in the balls, Gardocki!” — Brennan Huff
42. “We sail around the world and go port to port / Every time I come, I produce a quart” — Prestige Worldwide, “Boats ‘n’ Hos”
43. “You and your mom are hillbillies. ” “You’re not a doctor. You’re a big, fat, curly-headed f***!”
44. “On the count of three, name your. Don’t even think about it. Just name it. Ready? One, two, three.” — Dale Doback
45. “I’m not great at this Hallmark stuff, but Brennan, when I look at you now, quite as much.” — Derek
46. “I’m not gonna call him dad. Brendan, if you are 39 years old, I wouldn’t expect you to call him dad. Well, I’m not going to, ever! Even if there’s fire.”
47. “Maybe someday we could become friends. translucent steeds, shooting flaming arrows across the bridge of Hemdale.” —
48. “Or a few minutes feel better but then my emotions decided to come back with a slap across my face and I sounded like I was choking on a piece of biscuit from Popeyes.”
49. “I smoked pot with Johnny Hopkins.” “You don’t know anyone named Johnny Hopkins.” “It was Johnny Hopkins and Sloan Kettering. And they were blazing that sh** up every day..”
50. “I work at a college as a janitor even though I feel like I’m smarter than most of the people who go there. Sometimes, I see an written on a blackboard like half an equation and… I just figure it out.” — Dale Doback
Short Step Brother Quotes
51. “Dad, we’re men. That means a few things – we like to sh** with the door open, we talk about pubs, we go on riverboat gambling trips, and we make our beef jerky. That’s what we do, and now that is all wrecked.” — Dale Doback.
52. “Flat. It’s so flat, I can’t even…I don’t even know. You don’t even look good while you’re singing. The worst thing I’ve ever heard. This is twelve hundred dollars a week for voice lessons, and this is what I get? Okay, I’m gonna save it with the solo…”
53. “I’ll lick the dog sh** if you leave us alone.” Step Brothers Quotes
54. “That’s cute, I remember when I had my first beer.”
55. “I was about six there. You don’t wanna see me go to ten.”
56. “I think I might be able to help with the pan-pam dilemma.”
57. “I don’t believe in belts. There should be no for toughness.”
58. “I swear, I’m so angry at my mom. As soon as she’s of age, I’m putting her in a home.”
59. “I honestly, thought that I was gonna be raped for a second. He had the craziest look in his eyes and at one point he said,” Let’s get it on.”
Long Step Brother Quotes
60. “I’m fucking miserable. I had to get up at 10 o’clock this morning.” — Dale Doback
61. “Why are you so sweaty?” — Dale “I was watching cops.” — Brennan
62. “That’s so funny the last time I heard that I laughed so hard I fell off my dinosaur.”— Dale
63. “Do you wanna go do karate in the garage?” — Brennan
64. “I’m going to take a pillowcase and fill it full of bars of soap and beat the shit out of you!”— Brennan
65. “So many activities!”– Brennan. Step Brothers Quotes
66. “This is going to sound weird, but for a second, I think you took on the shape of a unicorn.”— Dale
67. “What poem is that from? Is that James Joyce?” — Brennan
68. “They broke! The bunk beds were such a terrible idea, why did you make us do it? There’s blood everywhere!” – Dale
69. “A dog is eating my mom and there’s nothing I can do!” – Brennan. Step Brothers Quotes
70. “I got a belly full of white dog crap in me, and now you lay this sh** on me?!” – Brennan
71. “Hey Derek, you know what’s ? If you lick my butthole.” – Brennan
72. “I swear, I’m so pissed off at my mom. As soon as she’s of age, I’m putting her in a home.” – Dale
73. “I don’t believe in belts. There should be no ” – Dale
74. “I honestly, thought that I was gonna be raped for a second. He had the craziest look in his eyes and at one point he said,” Let’s get it on.” – Brennan. Step Brothers Quotes
75. “I think I might be able to help with the pan-pam dilemma.” – Brennan
76. “One time I wrestled a giraffe to the ground with my bare hands.” —
77. “Don’t lose your dinosaur.” — Robert Doback
78. “Your voice is like a combination of Fergie and Jesus.” — Dale Doback
79. “Oprah, Barbara Walters, your wife.” You must fuck one, marry one, kill one. Go!” — Dale Doback
80. “I’m not great at this Hallmark stuff, but Brennan, when I look at you now, I don’t want to kick you in the head quite as much.” — Derek
81. “Maybe someday we could become friends. Friends who ride majestic, translucent steeds, shooting flaming arrows across the bridge of Hemdale.” — Brennan Huff
82. “You know what? I still hate you, but you have a pretty awesome collection of nudie mags.” — Brennan Huff
83. I thought that I was going to be r*ped for a second. “He had the craziest look in his eyes, and at one point he said, “Let us get it on. — Brennan
84. I still hate you, but you have a pretty good collection of nude magazines. — Brennan
85. That’s so funny; the last time I heard that, I laughed so hard I fell off my dinosaur. — Dale
86. Brennan is the voice of an angel. I can’t even make eye contact with you right now. Your voice is like a combination of Fergie and Jesus. —
87. I know that you are technically married now, but that does not mean they have to live here. — Dale
88. If you’re referring to me as b**t buddy, then yes, I do have a name: Brennan Huff. — Brennan Alright, that is it! You guys leave me no choice! No television for a whole week! — Robert Doback
89. I’ve been called the by people who have heard me. — Brennan Huff
90. You are not a doctor…you’re a big fat curly-headed f*ck. — Brennan
91. I swear, As soon as she’s of age, I’m putting her in a home. – Dale
92. Get out of my face, or I’m going to roundhouse you’re a*s. — Brennan Huff
93. Sticks and stones may break my bones, but I will kick you repeatedly in the balls, Gardocki! — Brennan Huff
94. I’m f**king miserable. I had to get up at 10 o’clock this morning. — Dale Doback
95. One time I to the ground with my bare hands. — Dale Doback
96. Oprah, Barbara Walters, and your wife. You’ve got to f**k one, marry one, kill one. Go! — Dale Doback
97. I think I might be able to help with the pan-pam dilemma. – Brennan
98. I got a belly full of white dog cr*p in me, and now you lay this sh** on me?! – Brennan
99. This is but for a second, I think you took on the shape of a unicorn.— Dale
100. Your drumset is a w**re! I tea-bagged your drumset! — Brennan Huff
101. A dog is eating my mom, and there’s nothing I can do! — Brennan
102. Gotta have my boats and hoes! — Dale Doback
103. I’m Dale, but you have to call me Dragon. — Dale Doback
104. What poem is that from? Is that James Joyce? — Brennan
105. Do you want to do karate in the garage? — Brennan
We, therefore, hope that this collection of Step Brothers quotes makes you laugh aloud, whether you have a stepbrother that you love to hate or hate to adore, or whether you’re just a fan of good comedy.